My Friend, Change

“I see you everywhere, the sweetest torture one could bear.” - Olivia Rodrigo, lacy.

I see Change as someone I both admire and fear. She’s someone I see everyday whether it's through her small gestures that greet me, or her presence to punish me. To be honest, I was never in a good relationship with my friend Change, our personalities never really aligned. I simply preferred to stay in my comfort zone at home, whereas she liked to wander off into the ocean to find adventure, disappearing beneath the waves. 

My friendship with Change is a big part of my life, but she can often be too uncertain. Change is supportive, but she’s unexpected. She’s so close, yet so far away. I can sometimes predict what she may curse or bless me with next, but you really can’t perfectly guess, sometimes it’s the opposite of what I expect. Change can surprise me and make me laugh, then hurt me immediately afterwards. Change was the reason why I moved schools in the first grade and took all my friends away. Despite that, she gave me a new best friend, who is someone I’m still close with today. I always wondered if her intentions were to watch me succeed or if she only wanted to see me fail. She always lingers around me, but is she truly a friend I can trust?

My friendship with Change is ever-changing. I know her, but I don’t. Sometimes I wish she could be here everyday to support me. Other times I wish I could run far, far away from her. Everyone wishes Change could be constant, and they all begin to shy away when she shows her true colours, but I think everyone still needs to have a Change in their lives. I realize that Change will always be a part of me, she’s not just my friend, but a friend of the past and future of the world. I have grown to learn her tendencies and accept her presence, and as her friend, I hate and love her for it.